Many things have transpired since last writing here.
Kirk Thomas is now the Arch Druid of ADF, he and his partner have moved to Washington with the goal of forming a Druid Monastery and a Buddhist Seminary; I hope I got the latter correct.
Things look like they are developing well for them there.
I have retired, at least briefly, from Grove Organizing of Enchanted Desert Protogrove, ADF. It has a history of 6 years running and I was ready for a break, being the main source of it's existence with very little support in our area.
On behalf of our Protogrove, I donated at least $500 + for the first Pagan Pride Festival which was held over in Las Cruces. It was quickly accepted, but our Protogrove was still not. The area here, is riddled with a lot of type A personalities who would rather give directives than work in harmony/unity, unfortunately.
We continued on our own, even as it was a few.
After a years' (or so rest) and more intense personal path studies, I hope to return to the drive of providing a Druid community here, that is, an ADF Grove/Protogrove.
My Sig continues to be of a great support, although he is not a member or ADF nor even Pagan.
It is my dream to win the lottery or have some pot of gold drop out from one of these occasional rainbows in our sky of rare rain water, so that I may help out with some endeavors. I'd ideally like to attend all the Pagan festivals I could handle on one annual calendar year just to have the experienc before I age. As well, I'd like to experience Ireland and find the original town of my ancestors in Scotland too! These are my dreams (some of them).
Recently, I got to experience near death and some of the messages are still seething out of my short term memory loss. How I came by this illness is quite a mystery and it's taking some time to heal. I was in bed for slightly over a month and my body is not used to laying down that long. Needless to say, I am rebuilding my strength and energy. I lost weight and my legs are retraining my muscles to walk. Each day is a challenge right now. I eat several small meals through the day and my energy levels are more consistent.
Speaking of 'energy', it has been quite an interesting experience to observe how much energy everything requires; my receptors must be extremely sensitive to this now with an amount of vulnerability I've never known except briefly for minutes following each of my pregnancies and I, on the mend.
I believe the Shining Ones have given me this express window to 'see' and learn by this illness as well.
I wrote a rough draft about the illness for the ADF Quarterly Journal, but have left it aside for about a week so I may review it with fresher eyes. I wished to keep it rather brief and not detail much about the cause of illness and stay at the hospital. I feel the outcome is a gift, in that I did not die! More too, that I should reflect something to share out of it. The longer I reflect, there seems no newer version of profoundness I am able to share. I did, briefly, get some words I should have laid down immediately, now have escaped, for perhaps more of a part two, filling out an explanation of a few things.
I also got permission to copy the 'Vigil Prayer for Polarity' written by Awen, ADF member in the Healers' Guild who wrote that vigil prayer. In all I saw about 6 members who chimed in and said they were doing vigil on my behalf.
The Vigil Prayer is so beautiful that I wish to attempt making an illumination of it and hanging it near my altar. I haven't worked my calligraphy in years. The inks may well be dried up by now. I will need several colors and I have some illustrative ideas for the beginning letter and the top. I can clearly see the illustrations so I hope and pray I still have the gift of art and illustration after so long.
The Vigil Prayer per my request, of course, treating with Healer and Triple Goddess, Lady Brigit, also protector of small domestic animals and smith crafter. I did not know anyone would write a vigil prayer on my behalf when I asked for the attention of healing from the Druid Community with Brigit as my protector and healer.
ADF member, Awen, is so vividly and truly gifted. I cannot begin to really explain how thoroughly strong I felt the energy emitting out of the words as I read that prayer, the moment I laid eyes upon the archived ADF Healers Guild message, it began vibrating and telling me more through the energy there in. Sound is absolutely sacred!
Awen will go far with her gifts and helping many, I pray. Excellent Vigil Prayer my friend.
So much has occurred over this past year, and even in the month that I was in the hospital.
I missed my sons' graduation in North Carolina, but he flew in to see me.
I missed my youngest granddaughters' pre-K graduation too, but at least have some good pictures and a short video. Very proud of both of them.
My older son graduated with both his Bachelors' Degree and also an Associate Degree. He did it in two years!!! You do what you feel you must do. He is quite capable!
My youngest granddaughter was named "The Best Artist" in her class! We were all very excited about that. We have a spattering of artists throughout both sides of the family. I must credit her father for some of this training, as he spent a good bit of time drawing with her at an earlier age. Her mother as well.
To my Significant Other, he did the most golden layered fantastic job of keeping up with EVERYTHING! From commuting back and forth between our home and the hospital that is at least an hour away; to feeding and watering the animals and a good dowsing to all the plants, including my modest garden that I was about to do more planting to when I grew ill and hospitalized for a month.
To one end, I learned how much of a green thumb he really has, even though he didn't want to have to participate in my gardening haha! Most everything lived that could and some / a lot of it just flourished! Even my pot bound cabbages are all still alive. I'd just purchased the little starters and was about to plant them before I grew ill.
I was visited by an ADF member who lives in El Paso, Texas, Todd R., and to my part, felt at great peace with his presence; it was as if he was my acting Clergy. I did not request a clergy visit from ADF, although I secretly hoped someone might take the initiative. To the end that Todd did take the initiative, I felt my prayer was truly answered.
I later learned that he had attempted to get into the Clergy Initiate Program and since we've talked, I hear he is strongly considering re-intiating that submission.
I feel we are so isolated out here in this neck of the woods and Todd R. is certainly a solid candidate, in my book, for clergy. I would be happy to see him as our local ADF rising star in that regard.
It is my hope that I will find strength and return to my endeavor of providing a ADF Grove arena in are own community. I hope Todd R. will be inclined to start a Grove in El Paso, Texas too. I will certainly do what I can to support that grove as well, as he has done for Enchanted Desert Protogrove, ADF, reciprocating his hospitality with us.
Currently, as far as I know, I am the only ADF Druid in our local community. My son, who was the other member had to finish his college work in another town about an hour away.
Speedwell, another of our Grove members, had to move back to Arizona, due to the job market there.
So, when I return to submit for a Protogrove again, I will either do it alone or whomever may re-emerge / emerge.
I am narrowly budgeted these days, so my generosity will be also, for providing as much as I previously did will not be as great.
To date, I was working through some more personal level training in Nine Moons, hosted and written by Ian Corrigan, ADF member and one of our past Arch Druids. It requires more energy than I currently have, so I will be reading and following the egroup and submitting my questions. The Nine Moons is not hard, but does require descipline. I had achieved up to the 3 moons before this illness rung out my energy.
My current energy goes for simple daily rituals and meditation for now and exercise to re-cooperate and heal.
I have learned the Kindred simply want us to remember them and anything more with them that is reciprocal is a real plus. They are understanding of what I can give for now.
As for now, I hope this brings a good update and I will make more entries soon.
Thanks to my Mentor Aigeann and her patience; thanks to Kirk my friend and Archdruid; thanks to my dear and loyal friend, Todd R. and soon to be Clergy once it is realized and thanks to my family and of course thanks for saving my life, my dear Daughter who disagreed with the local doctors and with your audacity and stubborness, used your own head ---took me to a facility and doctors who comprehended a text book symptoms case.
The infectious disease doctor told me had anymore time gone by, I would have been dead!
Thank you my darling daughter! I knew you'd grow into the Wise Woman you were born to be!
To my Sig, I love you and thank you for being at the hospital with me nearly every moment. You are a special person.
Be well to all of you my friends out there! Life is precious so enjoy it every bit and do what you can to make good of it in the 'right action'.
Wednesday, 15 June, 2011